Tai & Sora
by FREAKSHOW1
Summary: Tai and Sora are perfect for each other. Just one little problem: He's gay. A Will&Grace-esque story. Rating to be totally safe. Episode Five Up
1. Pilot: Here's A Story

**Tai & Sora**

By Kumquat Queen

of

FREAKSHOW

**A/N: Well, just when you thought it was safe to go back to FFN, it's the tragic return of Kumquat Queen to the realm of fanfiction!**

**This time, I thought I'd take a dive into one of my favorite animes of all time: Digimon. Yes, yes, I'm an "adult" as some of you say, so why am I still watching a kids show? Well, it's the same reason my grandmother has a swing in her front yard, it makes her feel good to sit out there, hopped up on Vicodin, just like it lets me get away from my problems and tribulations in real life by watching saturday mornig cartoons...hopped up on Vicodin. But enough of that hoo-haa, let's get down to business. I was watching an episode of Will & Grace(you can't help but love Megan Mullally), and I thought to my self, "Hey, just what WOULD I do for a Klondike bar?" After that, I realized a plot bunny had snuck into my house and had kids. Of course, this meant I wouldn't get any sleep anytime soon, so here I am, at 3:08 AM, with insomnia, bangin' this out to all you FreeksNGeeks in cyberspace....**

**ATTENTION: This fic contains several gay characters. If this offends you, (1) you're stupid, and (2) I advise you to leave now. If you think I'm gross for writing this, then go back to the first grade where your mindset is still understandable. If you're not offended by this, then please, I beg of you, read and review. Also, this is sortakindalilbit AU. That's all for now, my peeps.**

PILOT: "Here's A Story..."

Sora Takenouchi sighed to herself as she dejectadly put down the phone. Well, another man slipped away. Damn, and she'd liked him, too.

Fortunatly, the one person always able to cheer her up, her roommate, and best friend since high school, Tai Kamiya, wlakind into the apartment at that moment. He stopped, surveying her critically for a moment.

"Lemme guess...family emergency in Tibet?"

"Damnit! How do you always know??" She sounded angry, but both knew she enjoyed this, it made her feel better.

"Ah, my red-haired friend, that's for me to know, and you to find out..." Honestly, Tai loved leading her on. And he was good at it too.

Sora watched her friend as he started pulling things from the kitchen shelves, preparing dinner for the twosome. She wondered idly why they had never gotten together. Tai was almost perfect; good looking, thoughtful, sweet, caring. He was a lot of women's fantasies but for one sneaky little detail: Tai was gay.

Yeah, fate was definitly cruel, dangling this in front of her, and then snatching it away. It was like some joke the universe had conspired to play on her: The perfect guy, utterly intouchable.

But that hadn't stopped the pair from becoming closer than sisters. Their many odd rituals, like chiken-dancing before eating out, or singing Cher's "If I could turn back time" whenever they were near a jukebox. And then, they'd moved in together after college. They were like the dynamic duo, inseperable and thicker than theives.

"Well, I hate to skip out on, what is it tonight, roasted chicken? But I have some things to do at the office."

"Y'know you really should get a new assistant. And I know you know this is my first time makings this, so youe have no confidence in my skills, so you're really going to get a pizza and eat it at the shop."

"Yeah, well, I've got things to do. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. And you know I can't afford an assistant. I barely afford all the other shallow luxeries essential to life."

"Well, just remember one thing. If I really am bad at this and I get sick and die because you were out, I'm haunting you, following you around, scaring off cute guys." Tai made ghostlike gestures with his arms.

"Yes, but if I was here, I'd die too, so better that one of us survive, and I'd rather it me."

"Awwww, why can't I be the one to cheat death?"

"Duh, because you're cooking, hello!"

"Blast! You and your confounded logic!"

"Yes, It's all part of my master plan. Now I shall use my patented evil laugh to bring you to your knees! Muhuhuhahaha!" Sora laughed like on of those 1940's silent movie villians with the dastardly looking moustaches.

"No, kind Sora, anything but the evil laugh!" Tai held up his hands in mock horror.

True to her word, Sora did have things to do at the office. Simply because those things involved wine and meat lovers pizza with extra cheese was beside the point.

It was at that time that Tai's sister, and Sora's good friend Kari entered the office, as was not unusal. What was unusual was that she went straight to the window.

"Kenzo Sasaki is a horrible man!" Kari pushed open the shutters and screamed at the top of her lungs, and then promptly, calmly closed them and went to grab a slice of pizza.

"Problems with Kenzo?" Sora asked quizzically.

"Oh, you can say that again." Kari spat bitterly, "Tryin' to get me to move. I can't leave my friends, my family, my pharmacist... Needless to say, I didn't want to move to the Cayman islands, so we had a knock-down, drag-out fight, long story short, I'm not speaking to him. Me and Lupita are staying at my mothers. Which, of course, is almost as bad." She took several long gulps of wine.

Maybe just a little bit of background here is in order. You see, about fours years earlier, Kari had married Kenzo Sasaki, a clothing salesman from Okinawa. Maybe a year later, Kenzo's bussiness boomed, and he opened up about 50 new stores across the planet. This had allowed the couple to live a very luxurious life. And, since Kari had always sort of been a repressed party girl, she tended to dress sexy, and drink. A lot. Seriously, the lady was almost always sloshed, but she never showed it. She held her liquor with the best of them. Lupita was the housekeeper, she and Kari were very close, but they pretended to hate each other.

"Well, Kari," Sora offered, "If it helps, I never liked him anyway."

"Good. Stupid, overbearing, fat...." Kari's grumblings faded as she took a bite of pizza.

"So," Kari asked, hoping to steer the conversation away, "How's my brother queerest? I mean dearest. No, I mean queerest." Sora rolled her eyes.

"Well, we've decided to take a trip to Kyoto. Great shopping, fresh air, tube socks."

"Sounds tedious. Have fun." Kari popped two pills into her mouth, washing them down with wine.

"Y'know, you really shouldn't be mixing illegally procured meds with alcohol."

"Maybe," Kari said, "but YOU shouldn't be wearing pink go-go boots with a brown coat." Sora rolled her eyes again, Kari loved scrutinizing her wardrobe.

ROLL CREDITS

**A/N: Yes, I know, you people hate me. But c'mon, Kari as the Karen figure, that knocked you for a loop, eh? I know it was short, but cut me some slack, it was the pilot. Ciao!**

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	2. Episode 2: Tears, Queers, and Hookers

**Tai & Sora**

By Kumquat Queen

of

FREAKSHOW

**A/N: It may not be Thursday, but may I present, from FBC(Freakshow Broadcasting Company), in cooperation with SloMutt Productions and Infinite Entertainment, the fun, the drama, the heartbreak...EPISODE 2!!! I haven't gotten any reviews as of writing this chapter, but a member of an online writing group who also happens to be royalty over a citrus fruit can dream, can't they? Besides, I'm sure that eventually someone will review...right? Right.....? (cracking voice)Please?**

**Anyway, this episode introduces the two Jacks. I couldn't find one person to fit the role, so I split it into two different people. **

* * *

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Episode 2: Nothing To Fear But Queer Itself

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It was a typical morning at the Kamiya/Takenouchi household. Tai, Sora and Kari were lounging around the living room, Tai and Sora penciling in facial hair on the clothing models in Cosmo, Kari filing her nails.

"So," Kari piped up, "What are you two girls getting up to today? Gonna go pick out some lingerie, get juiced, and pick up some studs?"

Tai rolled his eyes. "No, _Martini_ Navratilova. We're going to this new Bisexual club that just opened up, The Bi-cycle. So to answer your question, probably on one, likely on two, and hopefully on three." Tai went to the fridge and looked inside. "Hey what happened to all our beer...?" He took one look at Kari, still innocently filing, "...And I just answered my own question.

"What?" Kari asked innocently, "Lupita forgot to stap on my shoulder flask. I can't sober up again, I'll get hungover."

Tai moved toward the door, "Well, I'd love to stay and chat ladies, and Kari, but I have things I need to do before tonight. Paperwork to file, reports to fill out..."

"...Leather pants to buy..." Sora added helpfully.

"Maybe some of that later, too." Tai opened the door, to find Matt Ishida, his best gay friend(and once love interest, the audience suspects) on the other side. "Oh, hey Matt."

Matt smirked, "I know where you're going. Leather doesn't work for you. Go with the tight black jeans you keep hidden in your closet that you think I don't know about!" He called after his friend, the elevator doors already closing.

He walked past Kari on the sofa. "Morning Cruella."

"Nice to see you Fatt," Kari didn't even look up from her nail filing. Matt strolled into the kitchen.

"So, Sora, how goes 'Operation: Get Tai Out Of The House And Into Some Guys Bed Because It's Been Four Months Since He Last Did The Nasty'?" Kari made a disgusted noise at this. " All is well, I assume."

"Yes." Sora said. "I intend to keep Tai in the Bi-Cycle until he meets someone. I already called my boss to get the day off tomorrow, so we can stay out as long as it takes."

Kari looked confused. "Wait a shot. Aren't you the boss?"

"Yeah. It was an akward conversation. I was a bit of a bitch. I told myself I'd fire my ass if I did this again on such short notice."

"Well, I have also taken steps to ensure that my friend gets a little." Kari made another disgusted noise, "I'm bringing in a hooker to make Tai feel better. If Tai hasn't left with some guy by midnight, I'm sending him in to give him a little pick-me-up."

"Y'know," Kari spoke up in an annoyed fashion, "One, if you're going to discuss my brother's sex life, or lack thereof, please wait until I'm slurring my speech, cause then there's only a 50 percent chance I'll remember it. And two, If you needed a man to seduce Tai, you didn't need to hire a hooker. You should've asked, I'd have let you borrow Lupita."

"Kari," Sora began, slightly sickened, "We need to make Tai feel _better_. If you hadn't just mixed mood neutralizers with pineapple Schnapps, perhaps you would too. "

"Listen, all I know is," Matt chimed in, "Tai has been chaste and boring since Micheal broke up with him. It's time we put the _sex _back in his _homosexuality._"

"Alright, I gotta go before this gives me nightmares." Kari started to get up but then shook her head. "Aw what the hell, I'm already so drunk I won't remember this in the morning." And she sat down again.

"Ok, bottome line," Sora interuped, "Tai needs to get over Micheal. But I don't trust him to do that on his own. So Kari, I'm gonna need some pills to slip into his drink. Something to make Tai feel so good he'll forget about everything else except scoring one."

"I got exactly what you need, right here honey." Kari started pulling pill bottles out of her purse, lining up about seventeen on the coffe table. "Let's see...no that's a tranquilizer...hmm, maybe this? No....Ah, here's the one!" She got up and handed the bottle to Sora. "Premium Quality Uppers. This'll make him feel like he's on Cloud 8."

"Wait," Matt said, "don't you mean 'Cloud 9'?"

"Sure, whatever. Their also usefull if he has a heart attack. Or is it a herpes outbreak? Aw hell, who cares?!

* * *

Later, that day, Kari was relaxing in the offices of Takenouchi Florist Service. Why, she didn't quite know. Something about watching the shop as a favor to Sora, or something like that. Either way, she was mixing a Vodka Martini, when a handsome blond man walked into the office.

"Hi." the man said. "Um, I'm looking for Matt Ishida."

"Oh, you must be the hooker." Kari said as she smilingly took out a wad of bills. "Here you go, honey."

"Wha...what?" The man seemed shocked at the very thought.

"You are the pro that Matt and Sora hired to give my older brother a little touchy-nookie-nickie, aren't you? Oh, jeez, why the HELL did I just say that!?!?!?!" She took a long gulp of her drink.

"Um...no. For one, I'm not, gay, you're thinking of my brother. And I'm not a prostitute, either." The man was abviously a little embarressed. "My name is TK. I'm Matt's brother."

"Oh." Kari regarded TK with a thoughtful look for a few moments. "Hmm. I like you. C'mon, honey, you're my new best friend. Let's never be apart." Kari got up from Sora's desk. "We'll go shopping, make-out in elevators, and take bubble baths together. It'll be fun." She started out the door.

"Um...Shouldn't you lock up. Soembody might steal something." TK was having very weird time with this woman.

"Oh, of course. Don't know what I was thinking..." Kari grabbed her drink from the desk, and then the two left, though TK didn't know where...or why.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Bi-Cycle, Tai and Sora were at the bar, sipping on apple wine.

"Tai, what do you think of my outfit? I'm trying to turn on the men without arousing the lesbians."

"You look like a million bucks. Or something like that." Tai didn't seem interested in what was going on. But then, Sora's chance came when he set down his drink and looked away. Sora quickly slipped one of Kari's happy pills into the glass, and watched as if fizzed away like alka-celtzer.

_'Perfect...'_ She thought. It wouldn't be long now.........

Well, maybe things weren't so perfect. Instead of making Tai happy and horny, he was now simply very hyper-active, and a little, well, REALLY high, conga-ing with a bunch of strippers. He seemed no closer to getting a date than he had before. The only difference between now and then was that he was no longer wearing a shirt, and several women were sticking dollar bills into the waistband of his pants.

_'Oh crap...what am I going to do?'_ Sora thought frantically. _'All I've done is drug him, but still no guy-on-guy action like he needs._

Tai's conga party abrubtly ended, and he came back over to his friend.

"Y'know, we should come here more ofteeeen..." Tai's speech was slurring badly. "Sora, have I ever told you how puuurty you arrrr...?"

_'Ah hell, now the mo is hitting on me. This can mean nothing good. Think Sora, think! What are we gonna do??'_

"Um, Tai, maybe we should go..."

"Aw, but I don't want to gooo. I gotsa meet a cutie. Get meself over Micheal...I misss him."

"Um, I really think we should go now." She couldn't let him near anyone who'd take advantage of him in this condition. Plus his speech was making her feel a little guilty.

"And thennn, he found someone else in a fe...in a few weeeeeks. Why?" Tai was starting to look sad, tears were welling up. Sora **really** needed to get him out of here now. "Why Micheal?" He was now openly crying. "Sora, les go home. I don't wanna be here no more..."

"It's ok Tai. We'll go."

* * *

The next morning found the two friends curled up together on the couch, a blanket wrapped around them. Tai opened is eyes, and looked to Sora's sleeping form curled against him. He gave a single sad smile, and then closed his eyes again.

ROLL CREDITS

**A/N: Yes, yes, I know, this chapter was still sorta serious. But It can't be all smiles, can it? Any questions comments or rants can be left in reviews.(hint hint)**


	3. Episode 3: Brothers And Booze, Part 1

**Tai & Sora**

By Kumquat Queen

of

FREAKSHOW

**A/N: Hi all! This story has gotten very good reviews, and I hope they can only increase in number. I'm trying to update frequently, but this chapter per day motif won't last forever. I do hope to reach the 10,000 word mark before my updating slows, though.**

**Also, I'm introducing a new opening sequence to this story. It's pretty simple, but I think it'll add something, if only for my benefit. **

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_CUE OPENING THEME, JAZZY, PIANO_

_A MONTAGE PLAYS ACROSS THE SCREEN:_

_TAI AND SORA_

_STARRING:_

_TAI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF TAI LAUGHING GOOD-NATUREDLY)_

_SORA TAKENOUCHI (A CLIP OF SORA MAKING CRAZY GESTURES WITH HER ARMS)_

_KARI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF KARI LAUGHING IN AN ELEVATOR)_

_MATT ISHIDA (A CLIP OF MATT MAKING AN ENTRANCE INTO TAI AND SORA'S APARTMENT)_

_TAKERU "TK" TAKEISHI ( A CLIP OF TK DOING A SPIT TAKE)_

_(FINALLY A CLIP OF THE FIVE EATING PIZZA, TALKING AND LAUGHING)_

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EPISODE 3: BROTHERS AND BOOZE, Part 1

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It was yet another typical day in the home of our two favorite people. but it wouldn't be for very long.

"Oh, my god." Sora walked into the kitchen from her room reading a magazine. "Tai, look at this: The radio station is holding a contest for two free tickets to see Elvis Costello. All you have to do is enter your name, and then be the first person to eat a wedding cake in under an hour. Can you beliver this?!"

"Can I believe what?" Tai looked up from his copy of The Tokyo Times, "That there's a contest that you can actually win, or that you're getting excited over Elvis Costello?"

"I don't care about Elvis Costello. I care about the free cake, you numbskull!" She playfully swatted him in the head with her magazine. "For once in my life, I can actually win something!"

"Well, that's not true. There was that time in college during that Frat party, you won-" Sora rapidly put her hand over his mouth and fixed him with a steely glare.

"We agreed on pain of death that we would never speak of that again!" Sora hissed.

"Whatever you say. I have to get to work. If I'm late again, all the donuts in the employee lounge will be gone, and I'll get stuck with the nasty custard-filled ones." Tai got his jacket and left the apartment.

A few minutes later, Sora was getting ready for work herself, when Kari and her new soulmate, TK walked through the door.

"How you doing, honey? Have you met TK yet? He's my new best friend." Kari introduced the two. "Now, while you two get aquainted, I'm gonna find Tai's stash of champaign he keeps hidden in the small space in the back of the cupboard." Kari wasted no time in hurrying to the kitchen.

"Hi, I'm Sora." Well, she had to admit, he was cute.

"Hey."

"So," she fished, "How'd you meet Kari? You don't look like a dealer. And you can't be a bartender, because you're too small for that."

"Well, I was looking for my brother, found her instead, and we've been together for the past three days."

"Ah. Has she showed you her boobs yet?"

"Um...yes..." He was visibly embarressed.

"Oh, well don't worry. She shows 'em to everybody. She let Ed Coch cop an eyefull just last week in a deli."

"Yeah, she's certainly weird."

"Don't sweat it. By the time you wake up spooning her, you'll barely even notice. Oh, I gotta go. Nice meeting you." and with thatm Sora also left.

But as Sora was leaving, Matt Ishida walked through the door, reading a pamphlet. "Hey, Sora, do you guys have any..." and as he looked up, he came face-to-face with TK, and he put on a hateful scowl. "What the hell are you doing here?" He demanded, "I Told you I never wanted to see you again!"

Unfortunatly, Kari chose that moment to come back from the kitchen, holding a bottle. "Good news, poodle, I found his stash of gin..." she looked up at the scene, confused. "What's this, what's happening, what's going on?"

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Tai was busy at work in his office, when he heard a voice outside his door.

"Well, of course he is, like a three dollar bill!" And his sister was here. His day just kept getting better.

"Kari, what are you doing here, besides outing me to the staff?"

"Listen, Tai. I've got a problem, and only you can help me."

"Ok, shoot." Hopefully this would just take a second. He had work to do.

"Well, y'know Matt's brother is in town, and as it turns out-"

"Wait a second," Tai cut her off right there, "Wait one second. Matt's brother is in town? And nobody told me?"

"Well, I guess not. I think I may have actually been the first to know, but you see, he's my new best friend, so I've been getting to know him lo these past three days..."

"What?! He's been here three days, and you haven't even told his own brother?"

"Well, that's the thing, you see. About ten years ago, they had this big blow-out fight. They haven't even spoken in all this time. And then, when I went over to introduce you, Matt walked in and it's WWIII! Now, my poodle's all upset, and I don't know what to do."

Tai gave an exasperated sigh. "That's because you don't know the whole story, Daffy Drunk! Ten years ago, Matt was engaged to this woman. And before you comment, it was before he came out. One night, TK was in a bar and caught Matt's fiancee with another man. When he tried to tell him, Matt got angry and told TK he never wanted to see him again. They haven't spoken since. In fact, they haven't even been in the same room together since the disasterous Christmas party nine years ago when Matt finally did come out. After that, Matt moved here to Tokyo, and they've been estranged for all this time."

"Well," Kari spoke up impatiently, "It's time we got them back together! TK's my soulmate, and I'll be damned if he goes one more day living with this uncertainty. Come on, Tai, were going to go reunite a family!" And with that, she grabbed him by the sleeve and dragged him from the office.

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Less than two hours later, Tai and Kari were standig outside of a room in Kari's mansion Apartment. Since she had insisted that TK stay with her until her found his own place, the room they were outside of was the guest room where he was staying. At that moment, Matt ran up to the pair for down the hall.

"Tai, i got you messege. But you know "Papa bear needs Mama bear" is only supposed to be used in a gay emergency."

"Well," Tai lied, "This is an emergency. Here, walk with me." Tai put his arm around Matt's shoulders and started to lead him into the guest room, when he suddeny pushed him inside, as Kari shut and locked the door.

"Ha!" Hari yelled, "Now you two will stay in there until you work out your emotional baggage!" But Tai had an uneasy feeling. Could the two bothers really work it out?

END PART 1

ROLL CREDITS


	4. Episode 4: Brothers And Booze, Part 2

**Tai & Sora**

By Kumquat Queen

of

FREAKSHOW

**A/N: Yay, it's official, you like me, you really like me! Well, ok maybe not all of you, but Rome didn't burn in a day. Here for your enjoyment, Part 2 of "Brothers And Booze!" **

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_CUE OPENING THEME, JAZZY, PIANO_

_A MONTAGE PLAYS ACROSS THE SCREEN:_

_TAI AND SORA_

_STARRING:_

_TAI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF TAI LAUGHING GOOD-NATUREDLY)_

_SORA TAKENOUCHI (A CLIP OF SORA MAKING CRAZY GESTURES WITH HER ARMS)_

_KARI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF KARI LAUGHING IN AN ELEVATOR)_

_MATT ISHIDA (A CLIP OF MATT MAKING AN ENTRANCE INTO TAI AND SORA'S APARTMENT)_

_TAKERU "TK" TAKEISHI ( A CLIP OF TK DOING A SPIT TAKE)_

_(FINALLY A CLIP OF THE FIVE EATING PIZZA, TALKING AND LAUGHING)_

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Matt was mad as Hell. How could Tai and Kari do this to him? He knew Kari well enough to know that she would stop at nothing, but Tai? He guessed the old saying was true: Like sister, like brother.

"Listen, Matt," Tk started, but was cut off.

"No, TK, I don't want to hear it." Ok, so maybe **a lot **of him did want to hear it. But...

"Matt, why are you still holding onto this?"

"Because it still hurts!"

TK sighed resigndedly to himself. This was going to be a looooong day.

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While the brothers Ishida were working out their emotinal baggage, in another part of the mansion, Tai and his mastermind sister were sipping brandy and watching the clock.

"So," Kari spoke up after a while, "How long do you think we'll have to keep them locked up in there?"

"Well," Tai sighed with an air of discontent, "Knowing Matt, there will be some primary arguing. Then a shouting match will ensue. After that, there might be a few heavy objects thrown, followed by a tense silence. After that, who knows..."

"Yeah," Kari sipped her drink slowly, "And knowing TK like only I do-"

"Wait a minute," Tai interupted, "You've known him for all of what, four days? And you presume to say 'knowing him like only I do'?"

"Well, in those four days, we've become very close, I'll have you know! We've wined, dined, and yesterday, I flashed him!"

"Kari, you flash everybody! Or have you forgotten that whole debacle at the Golden Bear Awards with Hideo Miyazki and the nacho platter?"

"Hey hey hey hey, hey! HE was coming on to ME! And for your information, they were tacos, not nachos!"

"Ms. Kari," said a voice from the doorway, "Your daily alcohol pyramid is here. They were out of Crown Royal, so I go you extra Jose Cuervo." Kari's house keeper, Lupita entered the family room, pushing a cart laden with bottles and jugs sure to be filled with liquor. She was a short, slightly stocky Brazillian woman with black hair pulled into a tight bun, and a stern expression on her face. She looked to be about mid-to-late-50's.

"Oh, thank you, Lu lu, you're the best. But y'know, I put that mouthwash in your christmas stocking for a reason." Oh, boy, here it came...

"Look lady," Lupita started, "I'll squash you like a wormy apple." Kari stood up, put on her trademark scowl, and sauntered over to her maid. Thus the pair started one of their world famous shouting matches. Tai picked out words like 'toaster,' 'bathtub,' 'Tequitoville,' and the two ended the argument simultaniously with "...like a walnut!"

Kari beamed. "Oh, Lupie, you light up my life!" The two shared a hug, and Lupita left the room.

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"Matt, we're not getting out of here until we fix something, so can we at least try?" You have to hand it to TK. Matt was a wall of silence, but he refused to give up. His efforts were rewarded when Matt finally turned around and sat dejectedly on the bed. TK took this as a good sign. "Ok, I guess I'm going first. I know that you didn't want to believe it, but I did see Maryssa in that bar." Matt made a noise that sounded like speech. "What?"

"I said that you were right. Less that a month later, I walked into the house and she was with..." Matt was obviously still upset, even now, under his current...affiliation.

"But..." TK didn't really know how to say this. "I'd think that that point would be moot, now."

Matt sighed, "It is. But was just so much easier to stay mad than admit I was wrong." Now they were geting somewhere. "I'd rather have stayed angry than put the work into rebuilidng those burned bridges."

"Matt, you should have known I wouldn't have held it against you. I mean, I would have reacted the same way if you had told me that Kira was seeing someone else then." Matt looked up suddenly, realization striking his face. "What?" TK had a bad feeling.

"Um, well, I never told you WHO it was I found Maryssa in bed with..."

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Now that the dust was cleared, Tai and Kari, who had been listening via a baby moniter, decided it was time to let the brothers out.

"So," Tai asked them, "Are you two ok?"

"Yeah," Matt said, smiling. "I think we are."

"Well," Kari started, "Know that that's over with, what do you say we go get hammered!"

"Wait!" The foursome turned to see Sora running slowly toward them clutching her stomach.

Tai was confused. "Sora? What happened? Did you eat the Beef Bowl at Oodles of Noodles again?"

Sora tried to catch her breath. "No....Remember the ...cake contest at the radio station? Well...." All of a sudden she pulled out two concert tickets. "I won!"

CUE END THEME

ROLL CREDITS

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**Well, I hope you liked. I may not get to post again for a few days, but If I can, you bet I will! Next Chapter: Kari takes the gang to her husband's wilderness lodge for the weekend, while Tai deals with guy problems. Also next chapter: Review responses, yay!**


	5. Episode 5: Sick Or Sweet!

**Tai & Sora**

By Kumquat Queen

of

FREAKSHOW

**A/N: I know I promised you another chapter, but in honor of Halloween, I'm writing this little tidbit instead. I'm not sure how they celebrate Halloween in Japan, but for the sake of the story. Also, I planned (and wrote) review responses into the next chapter, and if you're good I'll get it up tonight.**

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_CUE OPENING THEME, JAZZY, PIANO_

_A MONTAGE PLAYS ACROSS THE SCREEN:_

_TAI AND SORA_

_STARRING:_

_TAI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF TAI LAUGHING GOOD-NATUREDLY)_

_SORA TAKENOUCHI (A CLIP OF SORA MAKING CRAZY GESTURES WITH HER ARMS)_

_KARI KAMIYA (A CLIP OF KARI LAUGHING IN AN ELEVATOR)_

_MATT ISHIDA (A CLIP OF MATT MAKING AN ENTRANCE INTO TAI AND SORA'S APARTMENT)_

_TAKERU "TK" TAKEISHI ( A CLIP OF TK DOING A SPIT TAKE)_

_(FINALLY A CLIP OF THE FIVE EATING PIZZA, TALKING AND LAUGHING)_

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Episode 5: "Sick Or Sweet!"

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An the Sasaki mansion, it was bussiness as usual. Kenzo was away on bussiness, his kids were at school, Kari was sober....hey wait....Kari? SOBER? Maybe it wasn't bussiness as usual.

"Hehehe..." Kari stumbled clumsily into the lounge, collapsing onto a luxurious chintz armchair. "Oh, I am stone cold..."

"Miss Kari!" Lupita rushed into the room. "My god, I can't smell the alcohol on your breath! You reek of sobriety! Quick, someone get me a bottle of Johnny Walker, and seven shots of Smirnoff Ice! Hurry!"

At that moment, a very tired TK plodded into the room. "Lupita, what's wrong. Has Gardener been giving you those funky leaves he's been growing, because I thought I burned those..." Seeing the sight in front of him, he shook of the early afternoon cobwebs and immediatly started firing. "Ohmygod, what happened? Was she drinking Straight coffee again? Did she mix up her pills with TicTacs? Tell me!"

Lupita just glared at him. "Be quiet, you loudmouthed Boybitch. Can't you see she's in trouble? She crept in this morning, sober out of her mind."

TK gasoed loudly. "I never thought we'd have to deal with this. Our little girl, staying out all night...getting sober! I can't believe this. I just...." At that point, TK started to hyperventilate. Lupita got up, calmly walked over to him, and slapped him.

"Pull yourself together! If not for me, then for her!" Lupita shouted.

"You're right. As always." TK calmed himself down. Maid rushed into the room with a cart full of alchohol.

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As Lupita and TK dealt with their respective situation, Tai, Sora, and Matt were disussing what to do with theirs.

"I don't know. Halloween is just so pass'e." Tai sighed, "Let's do something original, something that's never been tried."

"Tai, last year we sacrificed stuffed goats to the festival of Samhain. It's gonna be pretty hard to top that." Matt spoke sagely.

"Oh!" Sora spoke up, "I have an idea. How about we get a big pumpkin-"

"No." Matt and Tai interupted Sora before she could finish.

"What?! You didn't even-"

"No."

"But I just think-"

"Listen Sora," Matt chimed in, "all of your ideas eventually end with us wearing pillow cases over our naughty places. And even though it sounds fun, Halloween is about sugar highs and and a morning drunk. We should go down to the parade on Apple Blossom Avenue. There'll be beer, candy, and drag queens. It'll be fun!"

"Well, I could use an excuse to break out my gold tube top and silvery mini-skirt. Sure, why not?"

"Hey wait!" Tai protested. "Sure, you two ladies might love it, but I'm a lawyer! I have a reputation. Don't I at least get a say in where we g-"

"No."

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"And we are very disappointed in you! We're worried sick, and you come home in that state!" Lupita and TK were lecturing Kari. "Anyone could have convinced you to become a missionary in Tahiti, and we'd never know what happened!"

"I'm sorry," Kari sheided her face from her housekeeper and her best friend. "It'll never happen again. I was out, I was thirsty, so I got some ginger ale! Nobody told me that it was a dry bar! What could I have done. I've been banned from every club in Tokyo except seven, they're all 70 blocks from here!"

"You could've called us, we would have come and got you!" TK said sternly.

"And you're damn right it'll never happen again. You kno you're supposed to carry a bottle of vanilla extract around for this sorty of thing!" Lupita was mad.

"I know, I know. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Oh, Kar..." TK smiled, "You know we can!" And the three shared a warm hug.

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Meanwhile, at the parade, Sora, Tai, and Matt were partying hard. Sora had downed about four margeritas, and had been named 'Keg Queen.' Matt and Tai were at a food table, dancing to a beat.

"See?" Matt said, "Wasn't this a good idea?"

"Ok, ok," Tai conceded. "You were right, I'm having fun." Tai tossed back another shot of tequila. "This is pretty cool."

All of a sudden, Matt looked panicked. "Um....Tai, you might want to look..." Matt pointed over to the liquor stand.

Sora was on top of the stand. And speaking of tops, hers was off, getting tossed to an onlooker. She was dancing and flashing passerby.

Oh yeah. This had been one memorable Halloween.


End file.
